Whatever, I Don't Even Like Whiskey

Know what's been pissing me off lately? That damn Canadian Club Whiskey commercial I keep hearing on the radio. You know, the "Damn Right Your Dad Drank It" one? Every time the announcer says "Your mom wasn't your dad's first" I scream back "YES SHE WAS. FUCK YOU AND YOUR WESTERNIZED VALUES." :P This is a strange reaction for me, considering how liberal I am. I guess I just want to reiterate a point, that men shouldn't be portrayed as macho studs. Just like women shouldn't be portrayed as delicate flowers of virginity. Stupid fucking ad campaign...

God Help Me If I Decide To Buy A Wii

An article appeared on the internet today and caught my eye. Seems that men get their coffee 20 seconds earlier than do women. I'm not going to comment on the reasoning for such a thing that the article insinuates, but I felt it was something I could relate to.

I say this because I've had some challenges over the past few months in the purchasing department. Specifically, when it comes to electronics. I was in the market for a new cellphone a couple months ago and I found it was nearly impossible to get a sales rep to notice me when I was on my own. It was like I was invisible. After roaming endless cellphone stores, one day I wandered into a Wireless Wave and was served immediately... by a female sales rep. The manager was also a woman, and between the two of them I had the best service ever. I went home with my precious Motorola KRZR a happy lady.

Now I'm searching for a laptop and the struggle has started all over again. Yesterday and today in Future Shop, I practically had to tackle one of the (male & desi) sales reps, who were mostly standing around and chatting like there wasn't a potential customer standing right in front of them with an interested look on her face. And weirdly enough, both times I caught an informative sales rep to help me out, he would be white. WTF. Why won't my desi brethren help a sister out?! :P

So anyway, I'll probably buy my laptop this weekend. With my dad.

I hate the system.

My guess is that electronics sales reps are taught/assume that men are more likely to buy goods than women are, therefore they should concentrate their efforts on helping men in the store. It's an annoying rule of thumb, that's for sure.

I Like The Sound Of My Voice

Music is worthless unless it can make a complete stranger break down and cry.

Frou Frou - The Dumbing Down Of Love

I've been aching to do some karaoke lately. Not the kind of karaoke I did before, where it's just me and some close buds in a little room doing our own thing. I want to be in front of a nameless crowd with my friends cheering for me at the top of their lungs. I'd sing something slow and sweet, something by Norah Jones, Sarah McLachlan, Imogen Heap, or Fiona Apple.

Actually, scratch that. It's not karaoke I've been craving, it's a little more abstract than that. I want to find a place that echoes and resonates, a place where I can be alone to just sing to my heart's content, everything from Bollywood tunes to Maaya Sakamoto to Coldplay.

I had a really interesting weekend, meeting up with old and dear friends. I'm dead tired because of all the late nights, but the events will give me some mental fodder to chew on for the next few days.

Stop Making My People Look Bad!

Against my better judgement, I've been watching a lot of random TV lately. Not all of it is the good kind either, because I find myself watching TLC and Slice a lot. Oh Slice! Where to begin with you? With shows such as "Rich Bride Poor Bride", "Extreme Makeover", "How To Get The Guy", "Party Mamas", and "The Last 10 Pounds Bootcamp" in their repertoire, it's hard not to get discouraged about how women are portrayed in the mainstream media these days. It wasn't always like this, I say! At least it feels like that to me.

I blame the mid-90s interest in pop music. Britney Spears and the Spice Girls were the beginning of the end. ;P

But seriously, I'm so sick of seeing shows about bridezillas, selfish women who trample all over their partners and parents and wedding planners to achieve some sort of ridiculous fairy tale experience they've been dreaming about since they were two. I'm sick of seeing shows with women wanting plastic surgery so bad that they cry about it, that they cannot see anything past perceived flaws, or who are unable to stand their solitary existence without a man validating their self-worth. I'm sick of women being portrayed as frivolous, petty, superficial, temperamental, and selfish. Just once, I'd like to see one of those wedding shows that centers around a woman who casually plans everything so that the family, the groom, the guests, can have a good time. No more of this ME ME ME stupidity.

... I think I'll go watch some Mythbusters now.

No One Does Bad Videos Like Bollywood

I was just re-reading over my blog entries and couldn't help but notice how... depressing these posts can be. So let's lighten things up a tad, okay?

Today my sister, in an effort to traumatize me (haha, not really) was sending me YouTube links for a crappy Bollywood movie called Cash. The final video she linked me to was the song Naughty Naughty. Yeah, wonderful title. But anyway, her warning to me was that one of the actresses in the video was a particular actress we associate with sweet, innocent roles, whereas in this video she was looking trashy. But... I couldn't help but like her in the video. Yes, the video is ugly, the choreography sucked, and the song leaves a lot to be desired, but the way this actress (the one I'm talking about is the first girl who shows up) acted in the video... there was something appealing about it. Sort of in the same way that I shake my head at every new video by the Pussycat Dolls, when all the while I'm memorizing the dance moves in my head cause they're just so damn cool.

There's just something appealing and refreshing about a woman who is in charge and unapologetic of her sexuality. If that means I need to hand in my feminist card then so be it. Actually, no. I'm keeping it. I can be a feminist and still love the idea of a woman looking/being sexy for others. Hell, I'd love to see the same thing for men too. Equal opportunity objectification!

In any case, you have to give the director props for filming the video in one continuous shot. ;)

With Fingernails That Shine Like... Oppression?

Ever notice that something weird happens to us ladies when we get our nails done, all glossy paint and perfectly shaped? We pay good money for this shit, and so we make sure not to ruin our indulgence. The result? Daintily picking things up, avoiding scraping our fingers, gently gently we go about our business, never letting our hands exert too much force.

Women are not instrinsically fucking dainty. It's a product of what we are expected to be, what we are expected to do. Don't run, little girl, you might scuff your pretty new shoes and dirty your pretty new skirt. Always about our appearance, how we are presented to the world. And it affects us, affects our behaviours, until we cannot tell the difference between cause and effect.

*stares at freshly painted nails* It's a good thing I work in a food manufacturing plant; I'll have to remove this stuff tomorrow night as per the rules. I suddenly don't like the way it affects me. I never realized how much it did.

Trying To Find Someone Like Me

While flitting about the web, I came across the People of Colour SF Carnival and it got me a'thinking. Thinking about what? About my people in the media, that's what. It's no secret that I am an avid TV watcher, and can I just say that it's always disappointed me that so few desi people are on mainstream North American television? (I'm not going to speak on British TV, because I do get the impression that there is more desi representation there, but I wouldn't really know.)

Let's put that all aside for a moment. I've been cruising the blogosphere for a certain kind of blog lately. I'm talking about a feminist blog written by someone who is female and desi and living in a westernized country. On the other hand, it's so fascinating to read blogs by people who live in India, because even though it's my culture and my roots, I'm really quite disengaged from that particular society. But yeah, looking for a certain kind of blog. One with a feminist, minority slant, but still deals with issues pertaining to all kinds of Canadian/America/Australian/British/etc. issues.

When I go to India in two weeks, things are gonna be so very exciting. All week on The Discovery Channel they've been showing this "TDC Goes To India" segment every night, and it's good to know that the Taj Mahal isn't under construction or maintenance or anything. ;)

And The Sunshine Is So Delightful

From Grist.com, my cool link of the moment: How to Talk to a Climate Skeptic, which is a complete listing of the articles in "How to Talk to a Climate Skeptic," a series by Coby Beck containing responses to the most common skeptical arguments on global warming.

Speaking of climate, the weather up here is finally hitting its stride and treating us with luxuriously warm afternoons. I couldn't be happier! Well, obviously I'd be happier with a billion dollars and Jesse Spencer as my personal slave. Or if impending thunderstorms weren't in the weather forecast. I just make the best of what comes along. :)

No, wait. I take it all back; this is my cool link of the moment: Quantum immortality, which is a controversial metaphysical speculation that states that the many-worlds interpretation of quantum mechanics implies that conscious beings are immortal. Awesome.

Urge To Castrate... Rising

Oh my fucking god, I'm seeing red right now. Twisty at IBTP has posted about a horrific gang rape case. Details of what exactly happened (because FUCKING FUCK THIS 'ALLEGED' AND 'INSUFFICIENT EVIDENCE' BULLSHIT) can be found here.

THIS is why I'm a feminist. The fact that shit like this happens, an underaged girl is raped while drunk and vomiting and the case gets thrown out, she gets blamed for the rape, the men are congratulated for pulling through such a difficult time in their lives. I mean... FUCK. What sort of sick fucks think that raping a semi-comatose girl is ANY shade of moral white?!

*walks off frothing*

Everything You Need In Once Place

I had some interesting conversations this weekend with dear friends of mine. These friends, being the educated and intellectual women that they are, gave me a lot to think about.

On Friday night, the conversation veered towards our favourite TV show and the issues that we had with the dynamic between the main female and male characters. (The show is Bones, FWIW.) It became apparent that I enjoyed Booth's character much more than my friend, as I am willing to overlook/ignore his more patronizing, immature, and assholish tendencies due to the fact that he is so very hot. There are so many things about the character that I would not be able to stand in real life, or even another TV show. But for some reason, I let my logic and critical thinking float away when I watch the show. Makes one wonder where to draw the line between escapism and practicing what you preach. I don't think there's anything wrong with indulging in the corny tripe that FOX airs every Wednesday night, as long as I am fully aware that it's just that. (Still, god I love that show!)

On Saturday night we somehow ended up talking about how we would raise our kids, and I find myself in a bit of a conundrum over that. My friend has a sister who got into a massively dysfunctional relationship at a young-ish age, and she was saying that for that reason she wouldn't let her kids date at all until they were 18, until they were a little more emotionally mature and had the self-confidence to make the right decisions. I've wondered where I stand on the issue myself for some time, what restrictions I'd place on my children. I used to think I'd let them date at 16, and all the while never warn them against dating. Now I'm liking her way of thinking.

Huzzah for the 37th Carnival of Feminists! Check out all the goodies, people. :)

This post made me think. Oh yes it did. MY GOD, if men are always complaining that they have no control over themselves when they see an attractive, scantily clad woman walk by, hence leading to things such as assault and rape, MAYBE THEY SHOULD START COVERING UP THEIR EYES instead of women covering up their bodies. It's not like WE'RE doing anything wrong, we're just wearing OUR FUCKING CLOTHES. MEN are the ones fucking things up. Jeebus. But seriously, that's some great satire, right there. And I quote...

Second, how do you know these women aren't lying in wait, plotting to falsely accuse you of rape? If you'd all behave more responsibly, act modestly, and stay home, you wouldn't have to worry about these things. You also wouldn't have to worry about getting arrested, or hearing women complain about your very justifiable behavior. I mean, you said it yourselves--you cannot be trusted.

Also, a shocking article about a Muslim woman in the UK who was attacked in the media for her choice of swimwear.

Finally, something I'd like to forward to my friends and family. A primer on women in advertising, if you may.

From here: I’ve never heard of a guy who got into a bar fight feeling ashamed of the fact that he was insulting to the other guy beforehand, or questioning whether that meant he had been giving the guy permission to beat him up. If an assault case goes to trial, whether the victim was being a jerk beforehand is essentially irrelevant, because the guy who did the hitting is the one who crossed the legality line. In the unlikely event that a sexual assault case actually gets to trial, questions will inevitably come up about all the ways in which the victim could have sent the message that she was willing to have sex by flirting or by consenting to other sexual activity.

Gwah, that felt... liberating.

Topics For A Monday Morning

On the language of rape - Passive Aggression: Foregrounding the Object I completely agree, FWIW. Bringing up the fact that a man is the hidden subject in the event of rape is a very good idea.

And on the same topic (and including a really wack PSA from the US Ad Council) - Women are to blame for everything, including and especially male abuse towards them That PSA is made of so much lose.

And on the topic of bad commercials, Kyso K in the above post says - The only thing that drives me more insane on the radio is that dog food commercial that suggests you should buy your dog expensive food so that it will love you, and then when it is gazing upon you adoringly you can project onto it all of the validation you wish you’d been getting from your ungrateful family. I admit it... I LOLed.

And from the "LOL AMERICANS" file - Canadian 'spy' coin mystery solved I... just... *headdesk*

Excuse Me While I Order Take-Out Instead

Okay, this just makes me feel... ARGH!

Fashionable in the Kitchen: Add a little style to your kitchen with a hip and chic apron.

That's right, let's push women to worry about if they're attaining a proper level of stylishness while they are busy cracking eggs and marinating pork chops. GOD. As if we don't get this bullshit from enough places, now the fashion industry reminds us that we are still objects to be ogled at while we slave over a hot stove. I might have been more lenient if there were stylish aprons for men as well, but not that much more lenient.

*sighs* It's a never-ending battle, I tell ya.

Faith In Humanity... Falling

White House opposes hate crime bill

"WASHINGTON - The White House issued a veto threat Thursday against legislation that would expand federal hate crime law to include attacks motivated by the victims' gender or sexual orientation.

The hate crimes bill, with strong Democratic backing, is expected to pass the House Thursday. Similar legislation is moving through the Senate.

But the legislation, which also would increase the penalties for bias-based violence, has met outspoken resistance from conservative groups and their Republican allies in Congress, who warn that it undermines freedom of speech, religious expression and equal protection under the law."

"Hate crimes under current federal law apply to acts of violence against individuals on the basis of race, religion, color, or national original. Federal prosecutors have jurisdiction only if the victim is engaged in a specific federally protected activity such as enrolling in school, voting or traveling between states.

The House bill would extend the hate crimes category to include sexual orientation, gender, gender identity or disability."

What the heck is wrong with the fricking White House?! *headdesk*

Ain't Nobody Who Can Hold Us Down

I have an excess of feminist links to share today. So without further adieu...

1. Heartless Bitches International
- They've got some great rants in the "Deal With It!" Rants and the Nice Guys = Bleah sections.

2. Said It: Feminist News Culture & Politics
- Of interest are the articles Bad Girls, Nice Guys...and then there's reality and Men and the History of Rape.

3. Feminists Don't Bake Bread
- The title is tongue in cheek, obviously. Just a lovely little blog; I especially liked the posts A Woman Walks Into A Bar... and Sisterhood & Solidarity.

Enjoy!

I'm Too Moderate And Chill?

While at work I was browsing through some blogs, and in particular I Blame The Patriarchy. There was one comment there that really stuck out to me.

In order to feel feminized and human one would have to acknowledge women as humans, an utterly insurmountable roadblock.

The thing that stops me every time about that is that how the hell can they [men] believe so strongly that women are worthless nothings and then mouth nonsense about “when a man loves a woman” and all that love-song rot? I’m sorry — what the fuck does “love” even mean when it comes out of their mouths? I don’t think they’re capable of it, really. At least, not toward us. Love means respect, the desire to emulate, admiration, the desire to see someone succeed, the desire to support them because their goals are valued... none of which has to do with what they feel for us, all of which are feelings they reserve for other men. What the hell does “I love you” even mean when one of them says it to a woman? “Wash my socks?” “Gimme your pussy?” “I feel abandoned by my mommy?” What?

If they are so fucking disgusted by us, what the hell is up with them wanting us around all the damned time? Why do they even HAVE rejection fears? Why do they go postal when they get divorced and start shooting up the local McDonalds? If we’re so hideous and revolting that merely being compared to one of us is enough to send them around the bend, then why do they even bother pretending to “love” us?

I really don’t think they’re capable of it. I don’t think they know what the word means. And don’t go all not-my-Nigel on me either, okay? Let’s face it, if a man is even vaguely capable of “loving” anything without a penis beyond wanting to screw it, it’s going to be after a shitload of introspection and truthful self-examination that um NONE of them have ever done, sorry.

Seriously... wut? I consider myself a feminist but even this is a little too much for me. I confess that in my youth I was honestly curious if men could feel love the same way women do, but I recognize the fact that men are not evil, heartless creatures ferchristsake. The longer we keep up this "us versus them" mentality, the longer problems will exist. Gender equality means exactly that: equality.

Random Thoughts Of Randomness

Today is International Women's Day and also Blog For Sexism Day. So I thought I'd share some random thoughts of mine.

I recently had the opportunity to see the video for Ciara's new song 'Like A Boy', wherein she tries to tangle with some gender stereotypes by wearing thugged out baggy clothes, tattoos all over, and illustrating the sometimes stark differences between what (black) men and women are supposed to dress and act like, at least in music videos. I think I need to see it one more time, and maybe read the lyrics. I think the tone of the song is along the lines of: "Sometimes I just want to treat you the way guys typically treat girls, and then YOU can see if YOU like how it feels."

A friend of mine who's a big fan of Louisa May Alcott shared one of the woman's quotes with me, one that made me think:

"I put in my list all the busy, useful independent spinsters I know, for liberty is a better husband than love to many of us."

I'm reminded again of a conversation I had with friends at work, that young people our age (mid-twenties) aren't in a rush to get married because men and women not co-dependent on each other like they used to be. Men can cook, stitch, raise children on their own. Women can make good money, fix their plumbing, and raise children on their own. There's no personal incentive to get married. The companionship and sex, you can get that from a regular long-term relationship. However, the social incentive (or should I say pressure?) to get married still remains.

I'm reading this book about the evolution of human behaviour as we know it. The current chapter specifically deals with the evolution of human sexuality, and something I found really interesting is that humans are the only animals on the entire planet who have sex in private. Every other animal (especially mammals) have sex in public. Fascinating! Really!

Here's to hoping that the future gets better, even though I am mostly a pessimist. But I can't help but see the change that may soon be coming when I work in a field that was dominated by white men and is now filling with multicultural women. There's hope yet. :)

This Is A Snapshot In Time

I know, I haven't posted in a while. Honestly, I haven't had much to rant about. But I thought I'd toss an update by.

Work is going well. My two years as a management trainee is almost up, so I'm in the process of finding a permanent position within the company, interviews and all. There was a position available in Edmonton that I didn't take for obvious reasons, even though I thoroughly enjoyed the city. Hopefully, the position I'm applying for right now comes through, and I won't have to think about applications and interviews for a long time. :P

On the fun side of things, I've booked two weeks off to go to India this summer! Yay! I'm going with my family (who are staying for four weeks) and we will be visiting New Delhi and Bangalore. I can't wait; it's been years since we've gone. I've also found out that a couple friends from undergrad who are currently travelling across Asia will be in India at the same time as me, so the possibility of meeting up is there. :) Vacations aside, I've got tickets to the Snow Patrol concert on March 31, which I can't wait for. I did have tickets to the Nelly Furtado concert too, but it came to my attention that I have a business conference in Vancouver at the same time, so that kinda fell through.

Otherwise, things are okay. Even though the temperatures are cold, the days are getting longer, which is always a plus. I'm watching altogether too much television for my own good and buying much more clothing than I really need, but it's not like I have anything better to do with my time and money.

Watching - Like I said, too much TV: Heroes, House, Bones, Lost, Grey's Anatomy, and CSI. My Boys and Avatar (shut up) are on hiatus right now, but I'm still quite interested in them. I've kinda lost track of watching any anime (e.g. Last Exile, xxxHOLiC, The Wallflower), but that's why post-season voids are all about making up for the stuff you've placed on the backburner.

Reading - I just finished JPod by Douglas Coupland, as well as volume 8 of the xxxHOLiC manga. JPod was surprisingly great, especially with me being in the state of adulthood that I'm currently at, and xxxHOLiC continues to please me immensely. Currently, I'm in the process of reading a non-fiction novel called The Third Chimpanzee by Jared Diamond, which is really interesting thus far.

Wearing - Today I went with eyeshadow with a gold/brown theme, with gold earrings to match (sorta). No necklace as I was too rushed this morning, but I've got a royal blue v-neck cashmere/spandex sweater and black dress pants on. Casual Friday demanded the wearing of casual shoes, so I've got my black and baby blue striped sneakers on as well. Which is... not a good thing because I forgot about a meet & greet reception I am going to after work. Whoops. Oh well, casual it is. ;)

Eating - Being at the office makes the eating thing a little more restrictive. The chicken sitting in my fridge is inedible without a big honking glass of water to calm the spiciness down, so I played it safe and brought some Indian food for lunch instead. Fruit punch to drink, almonds and leftover shortbread cookies to snack on, and my day is complete. Coffee notwithstanding.

Intarwebs - Life just ain't fun without a specific collection of websites: Livejournal, Journalfen, YouTube, Pandora, LastFM, Writely (aka Google Docs), Vox, and The Pit Of Voles Fanfiction.Net.

Playing Out The Metaphor

A while ago, I heard a good analogy that took on that old bullshit mentality that a woman who dresses provacatively is herself to blame if she is assaulted or raped. Because, hey, she's the one who decided to show off her body; men are mindless animals who can't help it if a woman turns them on. If she wanted men not to notice her, she should have covered her slutty ass up. *bitter sarcasm*

Anyway, the analogy went something like this, from a female POV: "Yes, I am dressed up in a way that shows off my body. I am advertising that I am looking for sexual attention. But like all advertising, there's a catch. If I ran a company and put up an ad that said I was looking for a manager, I wouldn't just let any fool off the street walk into my building and take the job. I'd have prerequisites and criteria that would have to be met if someone wishes to get hired. It's no different when I'm out at a party or a club or a bar. I'm advertising, but I get make the call on who gets the job."

Skimpy clothes =/= open invitation, fuckheads. Women want to attract men to them as much as men want to attract women to them, let us do it at our own discretion. But it just so happens that in our patriarchal society, the easiest way for us women to attract a man is to show off our bodies. What if men were expected to do the same? Let them feel the pressure to be lithe, chisled, muscular objects that we can leer at. Equal opportunity ogling! ;)

It's More Of A Fruitopia

Sometime back I was thinking in the shower (I get all my best revelations while in the shower, lathering my head with shampoo) and decided that it was impossible for a utopian society to last. The vision people have of a clean world with peace and prosperity is simply doomed because of one simple fact: people are not all good. Of course, people are not all bad either, but the fact that we range across both yin and yang within our species makes something like utopia a pipe dream. The world is full of good and bad, and it is our duty to accept and balance both, not to squelch one or the other out. That would cause... a disturbance in the force. ;)

I have a very Taoist approach to life sometimes.

To Our Sisters To The South

I wonder if I should take a moment to say something about the results of the midterm elections in America. I've never been very interested in politics, even of the Canadian variety. I know, very irresponsible of me. I guess I'm just a cynic at heart when it comes to politicians and the entire political process. It's easy to get disillusioned. But in any case, I am happy to see the Dems making the gains they are. It's very good to see them winning majority in the House. As for the Senate, I have a sneaking suspicion that the Republicans will win that one by a close margin, simply because the longer the decision making process takes, the more the conspiracy theorist within me jumps out and argues that dem corrupt Republicans are fudging the numbers for their own benefit. Like I said; I'm a cynic.

There is, however, one thing about these election results that truly makes me elated: Lady of the House, bitches. I'm referring to Nancy Pelosi making it as the first female House speaker. Frankly, it's about time. But they've come a long way, baby. ;)

(ETA: I was just informed that Rumsfeld has resigned. My friends seem to be quite happy with this turn of events.)