I'm Too Moderate And Chill?

While at work I was browsing through some blogs, and in particular I Blame The Patriarchy. There was one comment there that really stuck out to me.

In order to feel feminized and human one would have to acknowledge women as humans, an utterly insurmountable roadblock.

The thing that stops me every time about that is that how the hell can they [men] believe so strongly that women are worthless nothings and then mouth nonsense about “when a man loves a woman” and all that love-song rot? I’m sorry — what the fuck does “love” even mean when it comes out of their mouths? I don’t think they’re capable of it, really. At least, not toward us. Love means respect, the desire to emulate, admiration, the desire to see someone succeed, the desire to support them because their goals are valued... none of which has to do with what they feel for us, all of which are feelings they reserve for other men. What the hell does “I love you” even mean when one of them says it to a woman? “Wash my socks?” “Gimme your pussy?” “I feel abandoned by my mommy?” What?

If they are so fucking disgusted by us, what the hell is up with them wanting us around all the damned time? Why do they even HAVE rejection fears? Why do they go postal when they get divorced and start shooting up the local McDonalds? If we’re so hideous and revolting that merely being compared to one of us is enough to send them around the bend, then why do they even bother pretending to “love” us?

I really don’t think they’re capable of it. I don’t think they know what the word means. And don’t go all not-my-Nigel on me either, okay? Let’s face it, if a man is even vaguely capable of “loving” anything without a penis beyond wanting to screw it, it’s going to be after a shitload of introspection and truthful self-examination that um NONE of them have ever done, sorry.

Seriously... wut? I consider myself a feminist but even this is a little too much for me. I confess that in my youth I was honestly curious if men could feel love the same way women do, but I recognize the fact that men are not evil, heartless creatures ferchristsake. The longer we keep up this "us versus them" mentality, the longer problems will exist. Gender equality means exactly that: equality.

Random Thoughts Of Randomness

Today is International Women's Day and also Blog For Sexism Day. So I thought I'd share some random thoughts of mine.

I recently had the opportunity to see the video for Ciara's new song 'Like A Boy', wherein she tries to tangle with some gender stereotypes by wearing thugged out baggy clothes, tattoos all over, and illustrating the sometimes stark differences between what (black) men and women are supposed to dress and act like, at least in music videos. I think I need to see it one more time, and maybe read the lyrics. I think the tone of the song is along the lines of: "Sometimes I just want to treat you the way guys typically treat girls, and then YOU can see if YOU like how it feels."

A friend of mine who's a big fan of Louisa May Alcott shared one of the woman's quotes with me, one that made me think:

"I put in my list all the busy, useful independent spinsters I know, for liberty is a better husband than love to many of us."

I'm reminded again of a conversation I had with friends at work, that young people our age (mid-twenties) aren't in a rush to get married because men and women not co-dependent on each other like they used to be. Men can cook, stitch, raise children on their own. Women can make good money, fix their plumbing, and raise children on their own. There's no personal incentive to get married. The companionship and sex, you can get that from a regular long-term relationship. However, the social incentive (or should I say pressure?) to get married still remains.

I'm reading this book about the evolution of human behaviour as we know it. The current chapter specifically deals with the evolution of human sexuality, and something I found really interesting is that humans are the only animals on the entire planet who have sex in private. Every other animal (especially mammals) have sex in public. Fascinating! Really!

Here's to hoping that the future gets better, even though I am mostly a pessimist. But I can't help but see the change that may soon be coming when I work in a field that was dominated by white men and is now filling with multicultural women. There's hope yet. :)